Bill's Blog

Scroll back a few blogs and you’ll learn that I have landed on Santa’s naughty list.  Truth is–you probably already know.  It’s like a scarlet letter, screaming at the world: “Even SANTA doesn’t like this guy!!” That’s tough to live with.  It’s tough days at Beyond Photography.   I’m now on a quest to earn my way back into his good graces, so I’m airing all of the awful things that got me here.

Last week you learned a little about my musical gift . . . and that Santa thinks I’m not using my gift for the forces of good.  This confession is a little more . . . personal.  It’s an timeless tale of forbidden love, and passion gone too far.  I’m certain that you’ll soon see me on the Lifetime Channel, starring in a made-for-TV-movie.

If you know Sheree [a.k.a., "The Hot Chick"] and me, you know that we deeply love each other.  We’ve been married just over 10 years now.  We live together, work together, and now homeschool our kids together.  And we travel a lot together.  And we still like each other!  From the outside, I’m sure that our love story looks like a poem, written by angels, in a cloud.  Yes, life is good NOW, but it wasn’t always so.  Before Sheree, I longed for another love.  Santa reminded me of my faithless heart, and suggested that I come clean.

Ironically, it’s my fault that Santa remembered my former love.  Darnit-to-heck!  Santa found a love poem that I’d hidden away in our chimney.

“Really, mr. bill?  You’re a poet?” you ask.

Yes, as a matter of fact, I am.  Obviously you missed the onslaught of poems when my buddy Jeff had his spleen removed.  Luckily, you can click here to read them.

I won’t bother with anymore explanation–the poem says it all.  Curse my wayward heart!

If only I could/find 2 as good–as we.

Your love I savor!/My heart finds favor–from Thee.

I give you my heart/and you heart my heart–with ease.

My passion you ignite!/My bowels take flight–sweet manganese.

None can understand/when I take you in my hand–I must consume!

I ravenously devour!/Then within the hour–lusts’ foul fumes.

Only fools presume/that you are an average legume.

You are:

THE LENTIL.

the poem and me

I feel especially guilty about the photo above.  Notice the framed portrait of Sheree and me to the right.  I’m sorry, sweet bride.

so beautiful

Stay tuned for more of the ugly details of my private life.

Fortunately, Santa has still agreed to arrive early in Arkansas for portraits!  We’ll be shooting in Little Rock and Hot Springs.  [We're hammering out details of 2 other cities.]  If you’d like to see the information about pricing, and the process, click here.  And if you’re wondering, the answer is YES!  We are already scheduling appointments for Santa/Christmas photos.  Call or email anytime!  I’ll talk to you soon,

mr. bill

501.766.5671       or        beyondphotography1@gmail.com